im here to blog again !
haha, lol..
well, recently cant sleep at night..
haha, seriously aft break le arh, ii at night cant sleep so early..
hm, but yst..
ii told myself someting to wake up, yup.
nd ii finally woke up :]
so, yst ii had a goodnight sleep :D
lyk FINALLY, lol.
haha, anyway.
was toking to anchun on fond yst.
hah. while toking...
ii realised tat, its been a long long time since ii tok to him liddat le..
hm, nd he said me too ):
sorry luh ! D:
well, he said tat..
aft ii stead wit him, ii totally din tok on the fond or even tok to him online le..
yeh, ii agree luh.. although ii tried to say words for myself :X
anyway, cos really wat ! D:
is cos mus noe my limits muh..
cannot lyk keep toking to others guys wen uu got one le wat ):
but WATEVER luh..
cos HE oso DON BELIEVE THIS nd say as if ii still go VERY close wit uu guys, zzz.
sorry guys ):
anchun jackson aloy zhenjun esp..
hm.
but now its fine!
hah, so much fun without him luh !
WOO! ii seriously miss those days tat ii had fun wit uu guys ! :D
nd of cos, goin back to BAND !
oh yah !
today's the last day of famous amos for me le ):
aw mann, gonna miss all those peeps..
esp tasha, sara, liting nd jingkai..
hah, of cos not forgettin yan !
haha, sooo much fun dere luh ! ):
gonna miss the immune-ation of the cookies smell
gonna miss the ''wat uu eating today arh?''
gonna miss the ''watever!''
gonna miss the tsunami floods by me jingkai sara xP
gonna miss blah blah blah.....
HAHAHA.
will gooooo back wenever ii can de !
hahaha :D
I LOVE CP FA !!!
11:35 PM
0 letters in my letterbox!
WOO, went to work today.
saw tasha nd she was lyk..
HELLO, with a :DDD
haha, nice working place huh :]
aft tat went in saw yan, haha.
spike hair leh!
was kinda surprised, haha.
cos was abit sudden for me to see him in spike hair, haha.
mayb got date uh... hahaha x)
anyway, aft ii put on the apron.
tasha told me, '' today ur job is to... pack 600 120g inner for me.''
OMG!
haha, but its kinda okay..
cos ii lyk to pack gift items, haha..
with the help of everyone today, we managed to finish 320 bags!!!
WOO xD
but tmr ii reach FA gonna pack another 280 to finish, OMG.
lol, haha :D
yupp, working wit henny tmr.
HM. oh well :D
jiayou jiayou jiayou!
nd ii tink im helping to work til march?
which is jc starts lo.. heh.
pay tis thurs, woo!
faster faster :)
im broke aready, LOL :DD
CP FA really rocks mann!
WOO! so unlike ur working, lol :]
everyone are so friendly, haha.
lyk close frends liddat..
gossip.. crap.. laugh laugh laugh.. comfort uu wen uu jus brokeup.. blah blah....
haha! WOO.
niceeee place luh! :DD
11:58 PM
0 letters in my letterbox!
haha, don wann continue tok bout class chalet le luh.
hah, why rmb all those stupid days where ii still cry over him?
haha, cos ii mean.
he's gone wat..
not the new him, but the old him.
ii should not cry over the old him, but ii shuld live happily w/o him..
haha, cos ii noe the old him wants that too(:
oh well.
haha, went to his concert yst.
saw him, he's happy.
well, ii am too(:
had lots of fun nd most impt, LAUGHTER with anchun jackson jerrick :D
haha, concert was not bad.
but not as good as ii expected for saints alumni ):
well, but ii will still go for their concert de, haha.
din find him cos ii really don feel lyk seeing him, haha..
at least for a few months?
hah, yupp.
oh ya.
MARCUS WAS GREAT !
lol, everytime see him play mallets is lyk.
WOAH!
serious k!
haha, bu kui is my senior xD
kekes..
11:45 PM
0 letters in my letterbox!
yo, back.
haha, well..
was toking bout class chalet uh.
hah, went to downtown..
got lots of memories wit him dere..
haha, not HIM but the old him..
nd some places in escape was esp memorable..
all because tat, downtown was the LAST date tat we went tat dere was only laughter..
no quarrels, no a little of tis nd tat..
IMISSYOU!
but, lyk any other ppl would say..
jie an shun bian..
he's not gonna come back le..
yupp, hais.
why did uu leave me alone so early?
why did uu leave nd let tis some other person replace you?
replaced uu to become a bf tat's not caring, tat don love me..
ii really need you, you noe..
oh well, ii tink ii better really jie an shun bian ba..
cos ii noe he wun ever come back le..
SNIFF..
anyway sat..
ii was fine at first..
went to band in the morning..
dey tok bout my prob, yupp.
den went to band room..
jackson called me to the store while ii was halfway playing..
ii tot he wanted to ask me tings but den he pointed someone to me.
ZZZ!
some joker from tuba section was lying down on the tuba case, SLEEPING.
LOL, nd he was none other jonathan -.-
haha, den me nd jackson started disturbing him!
ii keep telling him to go for sectionals luh, haha.
den he still don wanna move so ii took pictures of him, lol.
he block his face all the way!!
aft taking, ii went to the teacher's room dere to show anchun downstairs!!
aft looking, anchun ran up nd sat on him, LOL.
GAY time, hah :D
long time no see tis lo!!
hahaha xD
anyway, aft playing..
jonathan went out nd sleep on the band room floor..
but aft more disturbing by me, jackson nd anchun..
he finally went sectionals!! HAHAHA :D
yupp.
aft tat, someting MORE interesting happen, LOL!
percussion was practising their song..
nd tis time, anchun called me while ii was playing, zzz.
ii turn ard den he tell percussion to start..
den, he danced.
he danced HARD GAY's SIGNATURE DANCE, ZZZ.
LOL, lame can -.-
actually ii took a video of it luh xD
hahaha!! nd ii LAUGH&LAUGH&LAUGH lyk dere's no tomorrow -.-
aft allll tis (:
jackson said someting nd ii felt tat, he's right.
haha..
'' gen ta fen shou hou cai zhi dao wo men zui hao hor..."
haha!
ii LOVE uu all mann!!
jackson, anchun, charles, aloy, zhenjun, clements, joel, jerry, jonathan, yongyou, ryan, jenson, joey, chelsy, michelle, hazel, liting & my especially NOSEY TRUMS!!
and of cos ALOT more, lyk my cus blah blah blah....
hahaha, dey are the best! :D
0 letters in my letterbox!
well, was the class chalet yst..
haha, had sooo much fun.
nd most imptly, LAUGTER..
since one month ago aft he changed..
oh well, hah.
the pics ii will post tonight or tmr evening de.
cos goin out sooon! :D
den tmr morning working, haha.
not goin youth today first ba..
gonna polish up my playing skills first!!
cos found out tat..
aft being together wit him..
ii neglected my band, section, my trumpet nd most imptly, FAMILY&FRIENDS.
so, SORRY all..
omg!
time's really RUNNING out!
haha. tink nxt time den ii blog wat happen in chalet wit the pics ba!!
CYAAAAAAA <3
11:49 AM
0 letters in my letterbox!
clements ; thanks! meimei(: actually compared to him, ur a better one, lol. miss uu too!michelle ; thanks stead, loveyou too(: its good to have such great frends lyk uu! :D
anchun ; okokay, lol. thanks leh, uu nd jackson for comforting me.. haha, uu two will always be the greatest frends tat ii ever noe :]junhao ; haha, thanks. yupp, he's really a jerk(: in r/s ba.. haha.
annie ; thanks! haha, but we'll say tat in the ltr part of my life ba(: cus forever, uu two!!
faith ; haha, sista! im so touched by uu luh! thanks alot(: sistas for life!!
tbg ; thanks korkor!! ii will de! :Dann ; haha, okokay! cheer up! *smiles* uu too okay!!
ziana ; LOL. wah, so expensive!! haha, mayb only for excos ba.. shh xD
yy ; thanks didi! haha, but no nid - - lol. calling uu to smack him will be as if calling a ahbeng to find his daiji.. hahaha! xP thanks k(: ur really a grest great frend :D
hazel ; haopengyou!! haha, okay! mai sad le(; cos he really not worth luh(: haha, thanks! love uu!!
7:37 PM
0 letters in my letterbox!
yupp, yst officially broke up wit him le^^
well.. ii din noe ii could feel so so, RELAX after ii broke up wit him..
haha, actually ii couldnt de.
but yst while toking in msn, ii cried lyk as if tomorrow im gonna die?
den out of the sudden ii jus stop crying..
den ii suddenly don feel anyting for tis heartless jerk.
yup, a JERK.
ur really a jerk eugene..
uu should noe why..
plus because uu jus changed liddat aft knowing some gurl..
if uu din notice, uu DID change AFTER uu know her..
of cos lyk ii mention in the "LOST" post, uu've changed in the attitute towards me.
well, ii guess uu tink tat she might ba a better gurl for uu?
den jiayou ba. chase her lo..
cos ii really tink tat, before we broken up..
she's aready replacing me in ur heart.
the reason why ii noe tis?
hm, well..
ii guess ii have to apologise.
SORRY, because ii read ur smses..
but if ii din read dem..
ii would still stupidly be an asshole begging uu to love me again..
hah.
to tink of it now..
im really a poor poor ting ba.
uu said tat its tiring to love me, but din uu notice tat.
its a million million times more tiring&hurting to love you?uu said tat uu cant say iloveyou now, but din uu notice tat.
ii SHOULD be the one saying tis to uu & even to hate uu?uu said uu will get angry wen uu tink of me, but din uu notice tat.
ii wish ii could slap uu now wen ii tink of uu?uu said tat its alot lighter without me, but din uu notice tat.
its really ALOT lighter&happier for me without uu?uu always say tat ii wun understand, but din uu notice tat.
uu are the ONE tat don understand? & in fact, ALOT?actually sometimes ii jus tink tat im so so STUPID to fall in love wit uu..
why did ii accept you in the first place?
wen ii noe the ending will be like this..why did ii trust uu tat we'll be forever?
wen ii still haven get over someone..why did ii believe you tat uu will love me forever?
wen ii don quite believe during tat time..why did ii make frends wit uu?
wen terry wanted to intro you to me..why did ii believe ur sweet toking?
wen ur actually a devil in disguise..*why did ii even LOVE uu?
wen ii told aloy tat uu are not quite suitable for me in the first place?&WHY DID II STEAD WIT UU?
wen ii told aloy tat ii will reject uu aft our first date..to tink of all tis now, ii had been a foolish gurl..
a DARN DARN foolish one to fall for a guy tat eventually gets sian of me..im such a cheap biatch..
a DAM DAM one to actually let uu affected me so much til my close frends said ii've changed..im such a despo biatch..
an ASSHOLE one tat actually beg uu & even agree to kneel down if you want while asking uu not to let us be over..after saying so much,
im so GLAD tat ii made the right choice to break wit uu.
cos ur really not WORTH, really really not WORTH.
nd if ur still liddat in the nxt r/s, den UU ARE NOT WORTH for all the gurls on this universe..
cos ur really a JERK in r/s..
so, PEOPLE.
if you noe tat uu cant commit into a r/s yet, den don START ONE.
if you noe tat uu cant love someone forever, den don START ONE.
if you noe tat uu cant keep ur promises to ur partner, den don START ONE.
if you noe tat uu will get sian of ur partner wen uu meet someone new, den don START ONE.
otherwise, uu will hurt ur partner alot nd will oso be categorised under the 'JERKS' or 'SLUTS' section..
so..
jus wann to say..
a r/s is not someting tat could be played around..
it takes alot of efforts nd commitment..
also, a serious heartbreak may result in depression..
r/s its really not a funny matter, so don trifle with it.
lastly, if couples or even married couples got stuck whether to leave or to stay..
ii shall introduce a book to uu guys.
its really really helpful..
although mine din work out, but its because he hurt me too too much tat ii really cant take it le.. nd he don even want to make an effort to salvage our r/s..
anyway, ii saw the book at borders (the one in wheellock place).
title is:
too good to leave too bad to stay by mira kirshenbaum
its under the self-help section in borders..
yupp, & tis is the end of my post(:
7:37 PM
0 letters in my letterbox!
hm, ii tot through le ba..
nd ii couldnt answer myself why mus ii let him go of him wen ii still love him?
its merely a test from god to us..
so we should face it together nd overcome tis problem..
isnt tat right(:
eugene..
please believe in US ba..
we really can de :]
ii noe uu know tat too..
but ur jus too confused now..
please don be confused nd mess up ur mind now..
it wun do any good to the both of us de..
the situation uu are in now..
is jus lyk me in the past..
the time wherby ii jus cant accept uu yet..
cos im too confused..
but uu confidently assured me tat uu could give me happiness dint uu?
nd told me to believe in us? believe tat we could be forever?
ii really trusted uu..
if not why are we together in the first place?
so, uu shuld trust me tis time..
tat we really can be forever&ever..
cos we really really can de...
iloveyou & u'll be the only one tat i'll love in my life..
always&always...
7:37 PM
0 letters in my letterbox!
well, since yst..
aft ii decided, ii still cant totally forget bout him..
hm, nd ii admitted tat aft ii saw him online..
ii unblock him soon nd even started to tok to him..
jus awhile luh!! hm.
but it all sounded lyk two frends toking, oh well.
tings really changed le ba.
he don love me le :'(
hm, okokay
nd ii admit tat midnight ii sms him whether can call him not.
but he says he's toking to frend so..
my last call, gone lo.
oh well, many memories wit him..
really..
before Olevels..
keep pushing him to study..
blah blah...
hm, yst before ii went to sleep, ii cried..
cried very badly, cos no one to say woaini to me before ii slp le.
but oh well, past few days oso don have wat..
nd he sounded sian toking to me, oh well.
today morning too, din noe wat to do..
ii keep waking up very early although my alarm set was 10am.
keep dreaming..
alot alot of diff dreams, but the 2nd last one made me wanna cry..
cos ii dream of ii saw his sms frm tat gurl nd dere was a *****
well, someting tat could make a gf sad?
hm, was so diff to get to slp cos ii miss him..
but aft ii wake up, ii told myself.
wake up, ho shi min!
he don love uu now, uu don have a bf now!!
nd so, ii immediately felt better le..
ii mean my heart, not suffocating le..
nd ii went online to chat&blog.
yup, working at 4.30pm ltr..
nth to blog le, cya.
bye eugene.. ii will never forget you..
7:37 PM
0 letters in my letterbox!
well, saw ur friendster.
okay, ii get uu too.
ii really do..
so, yup. takecare..
so its all true tat he don love me le..
oh well. den..
okay ba thanks for everyting nice tat uu gave(:
7:37 PM
0 letters in my letterbox!
today is the 15th january of 2008, posted tis at 7.35pm.
began blogging immediately wen ii reach home aft work.
well, recently..
many tings happened nd tings are changing..
hm, many frends said tat im lyk a walking corpse..
ii felt lyk one too, yup.
sorry haopengyous, for letting uu all worry soo much for me?
hah, yep.
dey're right..
ii've indeed changed into someone tat ii never dream tat ii will be..
nd its very saddening?
ii really donno wat to say..
cos everytime someting happen, ii wun noe the reason..
nd ii will be left dere alone to cry nd be sad..
ask him why he jus wun tell me..
cos he will not reply me nd will reject or ignore or even off his fond as not to ans my call..
ii told him tat ii really love him alot nd ii REALLY do.
but he oso wun reply..
nd jus a few days ago..
he said tat he don love me as much as before le..
ii really find him a true asshole..
cos jus a few days ago before he said tat he don love me as much..
he said tat he wun leave me nd tell me why so long le still scared will break?
so, if uu are looking at tis post now, which ii tink uu wun..
uu noe why ii ask uu those qns le muh?
cos im really really scared.
ii cant afford to lose uu..
but now, ii noe its meaningless le rite.
cos ii jus feel tat..
im aready replaced by someone in ur heart..
although ii love uu alot..
but ii cant help it to hate uu now..
why mus uu do all those tings to me nd tell me all those tings wen uu don love me aready?
uu hurt me so so much, do uu noe?
ha, ii don tink uu noe ba..
or uu wun even care if im hurt or not..
ii jus wann to tell uu tat..
believe it or not..
as a woman, we have a special gift from god nd tat's instinct.
as for me, my sixth sense is abit stronger den others..
nd ii can tell uu tat..
ur love for me now are soon to be gone totally..
because dere's another person tat uu care more bout me now..
so why bear longer pains?
uu might be tinking tat im jus jealous or wat..
but don tell me tat, aft 5mths of being together, uu dono tat im a gurl who doesnt lyk my bf to be easily jealous?
so why would ii be?
uu've really changed alot after uu know her.
did she change uu or uu changed for her?
actually ii don care now.. haha.
well, if uu wanna noe how uu've changed.
its not towards ur frends or changed in personality..
but its the attitude towards me..
aft knowing her, uu gave me cold shoulders every now nd den and treat it lyk nth happen..
but if fact, it did.
not to uu, but to me.
ii really really broke my heart
ii really DISLIKE uu alot, gurl(:
to tell uu the truth..
ii even dislike uu so much tat ii would feel lyk vomitting wen ii tot of uu nd even seeing ur pic.
not because uu manage to take away his heart, but the fact tat ur're a murderer.
a murderer tat killed my dear wei zhen..
the guy tat love nd cared for me so much
the guy tat ii've love nd cared for him so much
the guy tat ii've gave my first kiss too (as in uu noe tat kiss luh - -)
the guy tat held my hand in so many many ways
the guy tat make us seem lyk a crazy couple
the guy tat ever being approve by my relatives nd parents
the guy tat many envied
the guy tat really melts my heart
the guy tat ii will cry for even if a tiny ting happen between us
the guy tat took my everyting
the guy tat will appear suddenly nd say, XXXg of double choc chip nd keep smiling at me while ii pack his order
the guy tat will always complain nd act angry wen ii did not give him discount
the guy who will always walk ard in front of famous amos while waiting for me to finish work
the guy who ii would miss right aft he had gone home aft sending me back
the guy tat would make me the happiest woman on earth wen he said woaini to me the
guy tat ..............
ii really miss him uu noe..
nd thanks to uu tat he's gone now.
hah. well, ii guess its all a dream ba.
a nightmare..
but now im awake from tis scary scary dream.
hm, aft seeing tis..
uu shuld noe wat am ii telling uu le ba..
yupp, lets make it a silence one ba.
hm..
greatest wishes frm me to uu nd her?
she might be the right person for uu ba..
lyk wat uu said on sunday aft ii told uu the results of the quiz..
yup, uu had yet met the right person..
so tats why uu did not commit into our r/s..
hah, aft saying tis..
ii suddenly tot of someting..
someting tat made me cried lyk dere's no tomorrow now..
someting tiny but sweet tat made my day aft uu said tat..
rmb tat time wen ii suddenly felt really scared of our r/s?
uu assured me by saying wat ii had said to uu last time..
and tat is :
uu noe wat? u're jus the right gurl for me...
well, ii hope tat aft uu see tis..
dere's still time to salvage tis broken r/s?
dere's still time to heal tis broken broken heart?
but ii noe..
its all jus my wishful tinking ba..
oh well...
dere's such a saying..
wats urs, it will always be urs.
but wats not urs, it will never be urs..so, if we really can get back together happily or jus finish liddat..
its all the work of god ba(:
oh well...
7:37 PM
0 letters in my letterbox!
Are you still thinking about your ex?Here is the analysis:Your ex clearly broke your heart and you haven't yet moved on. Remember that time heals all sorrows, so look positively towards the future. Don't be blinded to the love that might be surrounding you right now.
LOL.
weird analysis, haha.
ii wonder if its true luh -.-
hahaha.
4:08 PM
0 letters in my letterbox!
Get to know yourself betterYour view on yourself:You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.
Your readiness to commit to a relationship:You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.
The seriousness of your love:You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.
Your views on education:Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.
The right job for you:You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.
How do you view success:You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.
What are you most afraid of:You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.
Who is your true self:You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.
well, tis is the result ii got doing the quiz, haha.
do it too?
cos the result is quite true for me, haha.
--> www.quizbox.com
4:08 PM
0 letters in my letterbox!
im back, everyone!
haha, blog again.
LOL :]
oh well. but mayb not blogging now ba..
don feel lyk le, haha.
cyaaaaaa peeps sooooooon(:
4:08 PM
0 letters in my letterbox!
